Thursday, May 3, 2012

My Ineffable, Ciao America!


For a moment
After my company had departed
On back to Old Europe
And the weight carried
On the birthstone of rationality
Lingered in the sunset
Through the expanse of rationed industry
The scars of the foundation of the future
Moving now in real time
Stretching the days to fold unto themselves
And repeat
For a moment
I regretted my immersion
On back into the foreign world of my home
As if I had travelled in my company’s stay
As life is not lived in measures
But in real moments
And the music abandons its structure in isolation
Drawn out from the streets
Traversed by new world thugs
In old world devotions
Let’s us here this moment incorporate history
Into our foundations
And raise the masts of a new age superstructure high
The future is now
Kissing under our sky
And smiling divine
She was a zephyr to my mystery
As only in our dreams can we be free
And so I push incessantly to make a dream reality
That is, despite redundancy, to set it free
Yes only when our dreams
Are free to cross the boundaries
And emancipate the lines of the rationality
Of space and time
Of old ways and new age
I should say, of crass duality
Yes only then could we be free
To move as our natures would wish
Were it not for the cold winds of God
Or even of enlightenment
Bellowing from deep within the East
And that would keep us stiff
Only then could we dissolve into our histories
And keep on moving toward the future
As to be free is to dance in space and time
In mockery of its commodity
And in mockery of the company of our now foreign homes
For I defect
And embrace my hypocrisy
As life is too short
To carry the weight of an unfulfilled silence
And I had found the birthstone of Bohemian resonance
Was colored jade
For what is life to a true artist?
It is distant and slips through my mind
These dreamy days
Observing the history in the moments
And struggling to dance
With the pure weight of God upon us
Or the weight of culture
Or better the weight of words
We would fear to embrace
Absent of our defection
Words that I’ve spoken solely and alone
To claim my distance
From the fears of my homely company
To assert the inefficacy
Of silence in the face of difference
And would thee fear to be guilty by association?
Would this command thy silence
In the midst of some affection?
And despite the intrigue of the moment
Miss, love is a timeless story
And it dances whenever it pleases
Whenever it has a ripe moment
And it jumps from person to person
Like a spider
And we’d best not crush it with our fears
For the sake of some hollowed devotion
Some old world trust
Now long severed and broken
Now longing to sleep
To sleep in the wake
Of a modern American dream
It only took a few moments
To veil the feigning ghosts of loves past
In new desire
And once I had confirmed
The distance in the eyes of culture
There was only movement left
To cover my emotions
And what a weight had lifted
Had set into the suns of other minds
A consensual orbit of crass divinities
Dilettante underwriting
And the good people
They were aspiring to the essence of their critique
In lieu of their amnesty
And watching their dreams
Wash through the cash flow
As if money were even real
In modern cultural valuation
And attempting to touch something more acute
More immediate than the realization might be
The idealization of the dream itself
As some higher moral ground
Than the stirring of its potentiality
In the molecules of touch
In raw sexuality
A peck and a lush goodbye
An existence that evades reality
In its proximity to death
That just barely kisses the hairs gently tugging
And scraping on the rinds
We had fed the fruits to the chase
And it just kept dragging on
The world was shaking in my reflection
Trembling in the emancipation of consciousness
As this the loss of love is liberation
Always moving forward
And the life the love is a moment’s embrace
And then to die
Yes live free or die
So ciao America
You’ve truly become foreign to me
And I become an alien to your reason
It was all a dream
A modern American dream on high


Jason Greendyk, www.jasongreendyk.com

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